For adults, there is comfort in the repetition of traditions, sharing of familiar routines and savoring familiar tastes. However, sometimes, in our own excitement to share with our young children, we can overwhelm them in our rush to include them in everything – give them everything – all at once.

Many people may not realize what they are teaching their children when they shower them with quickly opened gift after wonderful gift or hurriedly shuttle them from one celebration to the next and the next. In many cases parents can, at best, feel embarrassed by their child’s lack of gratefulness or appreciation for all that is being given to them. And, at worse, their behavior can add to parental stress and contribute to feelings of resentment for everything we’ve done for them.

Think about what your long term parenting goals are for your children; now think about how you can combine these goals with your activities of the next few months. One other crucial thing to consider is how each individual in your family handles changes, how they handle crowds and how much energy they can sustain in a social situation.

Preschoolers, focus on what is concrete – what they can see and do – not on an event’s deeper meaning or significance. They are beginning to have a sense of the fun of the occasion but may still appear callous and unappreciative. Their developmental ability to feel empathy – awareness of another’s feelings – toward another is still very limited (and continues to mature for the next few years). Persist in encouraging them to acknowledge what others do for them. Allow them to participate in small ways in giving to others and being a contributing part of the celebration.

School age children will remember on their own to thank the giver of a gift but many will still need some coaching. The most effective "face saving" technique for this age group is to remind them before the event to thank people, encourage them to make eye contact and to speak up. This is also the age when thank you notes can be sent as an additional way to acknowledge someone's generosity.